In psychology, there is such a term as “delayed life syndrome”. People with this syndrome have been in limbo for decades, expecting that at some point their lives will change for the better. For example, they dreamed of moving to other cities with milder climates, where life seemed brighter and more interesting to them. Have you noticed this in yourself? Then let’s figure it out!
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It All Starts Because of Dissatisfaction
Because of dissatisfaction with their real life, people forgot about it, without making any effective efforts to change it for the better. This indifference to your current life leads to the loss of its meaning and the loss of any goals. It is as if a person falls into the trap of “tomorrow”. Every day of real life for him turns into a kind of transshipment point, into a situation that you just need to wait out and endure.
Let’s find out why people fall into the trap of delayed life and how to get out of it.
Why Do People Fall into the Trap of a Deferred Life?
To understand whether we have fallen into the trap of a delayed life, we need to assess how fully and responsibly we treat our present.
Are we not in one of those scenarios when a person feels for a long time that he is not living fully yet, but is only preparing for the onset of real life? Does it not seem to us that the present moment is something completely unimportant, but only one of the stages on the way to finding an ideal life?
The Problem of Delayed Life Syndrome
The problem with delayed life syndrome is that at some point, due to dissatisfaction and disappointment in the current state of affairs, a person loses motivation.
Therefore, he begins to postpone for later not only his pleasures, recreation, or hobbies, but also the solution of those everyday tasks that require attention here and now. A pile of accumulated unresolved problems, like a snowball, twists a person, bringing chaos to his way of life, from which it is more and more difficult to get out from year to year.
This can happen to anyone. Often the reason for this is our high ambitions. We can dream about our dream job, moving to another city, or buying our own home. Our whole life can be subordinated to the achievement of one main goal. Therefore, we are ready to save on everything, work hard at work and close our eyes to the fact that there are no reasons for joy in our real life.
The situation is also aggravated by certain attitudes that have been instilled in many of us since childhood. For example, it is necessary to fight for happiness, and only with sweat and blood we must recoup our success.
Yes, to achieve a goal, a person has to make certain efforts, sometimes limiting himself to something. But with a healthy approach, this is associated with the concept of self-discipline, it should not be confused with delayed life syndrome.
How to Break Out of the Trap of a Delayed Life?
In a state of delayed life due to the gap between reality and its idealized image, a person lives waiting for the arrival of day X. When everything should magically resolve itself.
Instead of going into the fantasy world, you need to make a clear plan of action to achieve your goal. It should specify specific steps and deadlines for their implementation, as well as those intermediate results that should be gradually implemented. Tracking the implementation of the set plan will allow you to assess progress and take concrete actions, without wasting time on empty fantasies.
The more global the desired goal, the stronger the temptation to make it the only meaning of your life. However, it is important to avoid this. It is necessary to maintain a balance and learn to appreciate the process of achieving the goal itself.